Tagged: fake-tits

Don't get a boob job

- by admin

by Alyson S.

Back in April I got a breast reduction that took my massive 36DDD chest and made them a happy 'n healthy 34C cup and since then it seems like everywhere I go people are talking about getting implants and, ladies, I just don't get why. My huge boobs took over my life; they bothered my back constantly, made it hard to find clothes that fit my ribcage and my chest, and it's all people saw when they looked at me. Having a surgically enhanced chest seems to be the first thing women think of when they want to feel better about themselves, and here's why I disagree:

1. They won't suit you
I'm serious, I've never looked at a woman who has implants and thought "wow, those look so realistic and natural". Listen, if the top of your breast is as round as the bottom, you just don't look right. Why do you want to go from having to wear a push-up bra to looking like you've got one on 24/7? It's not natural, and it's not sexy.

Case in point, Donatella Versace:



Do you really want that to be you some day?

2. You "like how fake they look"
Do you also not like having a personality? Because that's what that attitude says about you. Because believe me, the guys who hit on you because of your impossibly unnatural tit-to-hip ratio don't give a damn what university you attended and whether you read Mother Jones on the regular. You know what implants tell other people? That you're insecure. In fact, you're so insecure with yourself that you paid someone to shove chunks of saline under your chest because for some reason not being able to see your feet past your cleav makes you feel better about yourself.

Which leads me to my next point:

3. It's a waste of money
My reductive surgery was 100% paid for by the government because believe it or not it's a huge (har har) hassle to have huge boobs and they were actually detrimental to my lifestyle. Here in Canada at least it's considered a necessary surgery, but implants (surprise surprise) are not. The approximate cost for breast implants in Canada is $6,000-$7,000 for saline and $7,000-$10,000 for cohesive gel. That's a year (or two) of university, or a down payment on a car, or a really great trip somewhere. Go have the time of your life on a topless beach somewhere with your bra-less, scar-free boobs and get over your tit envy. You'll thank me later.

4. You think it will make you more attractive to the opposite sex
If this is your reasoning, start hanging around with some men who are actually adults and don't care about shallow shit like how big your cup size is. Honestly.

5. You're "sick of being a AA"
Stop for a second and think about how much you weigh, then think about your cup size, and odds are your little boobs fit really well onto your frame, whether or not you think so. Sure your breasts might not be spilling out of that tube-dress but at least you don't look like you've been jamming yourself into it and let's face it the fashion industry is geared towards women who are waif-thin, so you're ahead of the pack already. Plus you don't have to deal with gross droopage down the line, and no amount of surgical maneuvering is going to be able to stop that.

6. You think having bigger boobs will make you more popular/successful/etc
Recently I read something on Raymi's blog that shocked me. She's been talking quite a bit recently about getting implants and in her most recent post responded to someone encouraging her not to by saying "but then i can skyrocket to infamy fast like heidi montag and make a lot more money then retire in portland. business investment. plus they’ll take the heat off my nose" and while you need to take most things Raymi says with a grain of salt this really bugs me because she's become so huge already without slicing herself up and it's one of the things I've always respected about her.

Besides, do you really think huge boobs will make people like/admire/appreciate/find you more attractive than they already do? They won't. Your friends love you for who you are (if they don't ditch them asap) and if you're dating/looking for a man with any sort of integrity he'll love you regardless of what cup size you are.

7. "I don't care what people think. My implants are for me"
No, they aren't, because if you didn't care what people thought you wouldn't be caving to social pressure and walking around with big fake boobs on your chest for all to see. Do you really think that unless there was that societal pressure to be rail-thin and have boobs the size of Mount Everest you'd be feeling the way you do? Of course not. Back before the industrial revolution girls were supposed to be plump because it was a sign of social status (aka they weren't working out in the fields all the time). But now heaven forbid if you can't squeeze into that size 00 dress around your waist while filling a D cup on top. See how times change? Which one seems more healthy (both physically and mentally) to you? I shouldn't have to tell you the answer.

Listen, everyone struggles with self-image issues but implants are the most overt way you can tell people "I don't like how I look" without flat-out screaming it at them. By letting someone slice you open and shove saline under your nipples (which might lose sensation, don't forget) you're not taking a stand for women or even for yourself. You're letting your own insecurities rob you not just of your own personal finances, but also of other people's respect.
 

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