November 12, 2009

last night I had a dream that he and I ate a bunch of ecstasy in the form of pills and also these little cake-things that were like larger versions of Roll-Aids.

we got in a car and went to go have dinner with my family at my Nan’s

and the whole way there I was stressing that I wasn’t going to be able to eat anything
and my family would know how fucked-up I was because if I get fuckered my pupils become massive and I have super-light eyes
and it’s totally obvious.

and I was stressing hard.

we got there and were sitting outside for some reason and I looked at him and watched his pupils swell up and overtake his irises and I thought we are so fucked.

my nan came out and I said hi and she ignored me, walked in the other direction and I thought
fuck yes, here’s our chance
and I said “if you’re going to be a bitch and not talk, we’re leaving”
so we got into the car and drove away talking about how much e-tarded sex we were going to have.

we rounded a bend and there was a lake with a washed-out road winding through it and the hill in the background were lit up with the lights of far-off buildings
everything was a deep purple or blue or green and the lights twinkled like fireflies and for some reason Matt Good’s Suburbia started playing and I was charmed and I said
“look, the lights are beautiful”
and they were
and it was so perfect.

and then he drove off the road and into the green, mossy water and somehow the car sunk into the lake and we were standing in waist-high water
dragonflies buzzing around us
and over Matt Good singing you’ll realize I’m missing he yelled

“PISS!”

and I woke up.