Tagged: gary-oldman

today is gary oldman's birthday

- by admin

what's embarrassing is that up until a few years ago I never actually knew who gary oldman wasgaryoldman111203_560b

I knew he was in a lot of movies that I liked

and he played a lot of the best characters

but if you asked me to point to a dude on a page in a magazine and say

'look that's gary oldman'

I wouldn't be able to.

which in hindsight is a testament to his versatile face and also acting.

and since I haven't really written anything on this here old blog for a while

let me tell you about my first real encounter with gary oldman in a movie.

so when I was a younger I dated this guy who was a huge film buff. massive.

as in, had a huge dvd collection for no reason other than he liked to have every movie he liked in this massive perfectly alphabetized library in his living room

buddy wouldn't have money to pay his own way to see a movie on a friday night but could afford to blow all his cash on dvds

(kinda sour grapes there still, I guess)

anyway one day we were hanging out at his place (remember, no money to go out) and eating pizza and basically just vegging out and I said

"you know I'm not really sure what gary oldman looks like"

which apparently was sacrilege because everyone needs to fully grasp and worship gary oldman

(now as an adult I understand why, but I digress)

so we started watching the fifth element because it's an amazing movie and also gary oldman is in it

and even though I knew who he played in the movie it was bf's favourite so it was the one we watched.

(disclaimer: I've seen the fifth element a million times. I love it, but I've seen it a lot)

so since I've seen it a lot and he had seen it a lot we started making out

because that's what happens when a boy and a girl watch movies alone together someplace

(and sometimes other stuff but that's not in this story as you will find out)

so we're making out and I'm having a good time because I like this guy and he's a phenomenal kisser and suddenly he grabs my head and whips it around and goes

"look there's gary oldman's character!"

which, while true, hurt the shit out of my neck and completely ruined the mood

which wouldn't even have been so bad if he hadn't basically ignored me

and spent the next few minutes talking about the scene in detail

while I sat there making a grumpycat face on the couch

luckily I've moved up in the world since then

and am now dating a guy who loves me more than gary oldman (I hope)

we just won't be watching the fifth element together anytime soon.


Tinker Tailor Soldier Snore

- by admin

is what they should have called Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy which is a movie starring a bunch of really amazing British actors which fools you into thinking the movie will be anything but slow-moving, dull, tedious, and a lot of other synonyms for 'boring', which is what it was.

the picture above this text is a lie, or at least a partial one. the first bit is interesting but then it goes on forever and we just couldn't deal with it anymore.

in case you missed it, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy vs Spy is a film based on what is apparently a great book by John LeCarré which is about british spies and the amazing Gary Oldman stars a spy who comes back to start spying on a bunch of other spies of whom he used to be a part of, but isn't anymore due to a big complicated plot that I don't feel like going into because the plot managed to make a movie which is under two hours feel like four hours, which is why we didn't finish it.

the reason we started watching was 1. because we had just watched TMNT and wanted something "more serious" and 2. because I am addicted to watching Benedict Cumberbatch and now that Sherlock is between seasons I need to get my BC where I can get it which is apparently in Tinkerbell, Tailor, Soldier, Spy which is unfortunate because even his prime acting and sharp suits didn't save it.

but with a cast line-up including Gary Oldman, The Big BC, Colin Firth, Tom Hardy, John Hurt and more, Tinker, Taylor Swift, Soldier, Spy should be great, and the first part is except for the fact that it cuts between past and present tense so quickly that we had to stop the video and double-check that we weren't both confused about what was going on. which we usually were. maybe that's the point but there's only a year between both timelines so it's not even like you can really use style as an indicator, just Gary Oldman's hair colour changing back and forth.

maybe the book is better and certainly the film adaptation of The Spy Who Came in From The Cold was amazing but basically this film felt like a big circle-jerk about uppity slow british dramas and an attempt to see how long that people would sit in their seats and endure the whole thing, which was 2/3 of the way through for us.

and thanks to wikipedia I still get to know how it ended. which was how we both assumed it would end.

save yourself some time and read the plot here.


« All tags