Tagged: reviews-2

Things that appalled me about "The Queen of Versailles"

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All of it.

But I still recommend that you watch it in order to experience the monumental amount of materialism, self-indulgence and wastefulness portrayed in the film, along with the complete lack of class, good taste and modesty, as well as the warped vision of the 'American Dream' that it displays.

Bill Cunningham New York

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Which I just finished watching and I can't recommend enough.

In case you don't know Bill Cunningham is this amazing man who basically has gone around New York for decades and documented fashion on the runway but mostly off of it. People who are interested in people interest me and I'm hugely interested in Bill Cunningham and even more so now that I've watched this movie about him.

One of my favourite parts of the film is when Bill is given an award and he says

"it's as true today as it ever was... he who seeks beauty will find it"

which made me tear up and gave me chills because it's so unbelievably true.

That's what made the film so good and I think what makes people like Bill Cunningham: he's focused on the beauty in the world and that's what he tries to capture in his photos. There's a part in the movie where they talk about a falling out he had with a magazine because they used his photos in to make fun of people instead of praising their personal styles which is so inspiring to me. He celebrates individuality and personal expression and doesn't give a damn about much else.

Oh plus he rides his bike EVERYWHERE which makes him even more endearing.

I can't recommend Bill Cunningham: New York enough. It's a charming and inspiring reminder to do what you love.

I really liked the first Iron Man

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I don't remember seeing it or who I saw it with but I know that I enjoyed it more than most people because I'm really not familiar with the franchise beyond the movies. iron man wasn't one of the comic books I was into as a lass so I got to enjoy it purely for it's over-the-top fight scenes and also how tasty Robert Downey Jr. is.

when the second Iron Man was in theatres I saw it kinda by accident. Tyrone and I were in Toronto after being in Montreal for MUTEK for a week with all of our friends, and we were staying with my aunt & uncle for a few days before going home.

we had been walking around and didn't want to go back to my aunts house just yet so we figured

fuck it, let's go see iron man 2

it was okay from what I remember. we were both wiped and I think Tyrone dozed off but I stayed relatively alert due to an infusion of cola and sugary snacks.


I didn't expect the 3rd one to look like anything I'd want to see because the 2nd one wasn't really anything that I wanted to see

filler. action. hot girls. RDJ.

topical stuff perfect to watch after a week of nonstop partying, adventuring and memory-making.

though I have to say this trailer looks better than I thought a 3rd instalment would.

but I'm still way more excited for star trek.

I think the most telling thing about Das Weisse Band

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is the difference between how it we received in Germany, where it was produced:

In Oberösterreichische Nachrichten, Julia Evers called the film "an oppressive and impressive moral painting, in which neither the audience nor the people in the village find an escape valve from the web of authority, hierarchy and violence. [...] Everything in The White Ribbon is true. And that is why it is so difficult to bear."[20] Markus Keuschnigg of Die Presse praised the "sober cinematography" along with the pacing of the narrative. Keuschnigg opposed any claims about the director being cold and cynical, instead hailing him as uncompromising and sincerely humanistic.[21] Die Welt's Peter Zander compared The White Ribbon to Haneke's previous films Benny's Video and Funny Games, both centering around the theme of violence. Zander concluded that while the violence in the previous films had seemed distant and constructed, The White Ribbon demonstrates how it is a part of our reality. Zander also applauded the "perfectly cast children", whom he held as "the real stars of this film".[22] "Mighty, monolithic and fearsome it stands in the cinema landscape. A horror drama, free from horror images", Christian Buß wrote in Der Spiegel, and expressed delight in how the film deviates from the conventions of contemporary German cinema: "Director Michael Haneke forces us to learn how to see again". Buß suggested references in the name of the fictitious village, "Eichwald", to the Nazi Obersturmbannführer Adolf Eichmann and the Buchenwald concentration camp.[23] Eichwald is however a common German place name, meaning the "Oak Forest".

and by US media:

Critics such as Claudia Puig of USA Today praised the film's cinematography and performances while criticizing its "glacial pace" and "lack [of] the satisfaction of a resolution or catharsis."[24] Ann Hornaday of the Washington Post wrote that trying to locate the seeds of fascism in religious hypocrisy and authoritarianism is "a simplistic notion, disturbing not in its surprise or profundity, but in the sadistic trouble the filmmaker has taken to advance it."[25] Philip Maher at allmovie.com found the director "ham-handed" and "in the end his attempt at lucidity inevitably draws us further from the essential nature of fascism".[26] [via wikipedia]

some people just don't get it.

(also, watch this movie)

home sick watching eat pray love

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don't ask why. I don't know why. I just have a throbbing headache and pressure behind my eyes and a scratch in my throat and Ileft work because I was useless there and came home and decided

I want to watch a clichéd movie with julia roberts in it and sip tea in my yoga pants

even though I don't really like julia roberts.

she's pretty but she's got a bit wide mouth and large teeth and she reminds me of a slightly calmer less neurotic jennifer aniston, who I can't stand. but she always seems to be in movies that I like such as erin brockovich, ocean's eleven, charlie wilson's war, pretty woman, and stepmom (yes). she looks smokin' for 45 though so I'll give her that.

it's an okay movie so far thought I guess, better than some of the other feel-good chick flicks out there though that might just be because it takes place in some exotic locations and the cinematography and close-up shots of food are pretty nice to look at.

she just turned down skinny dipping with a really hot australian with a six-pack in the ocean and while I guess that's supposed to show that she's growing up and 'discovering herself' that was a pretty dumb move if you ask me. though I guess she'll be making out with javier bardem soon enough.

oh he just crashed her pad and brought her some 'hangover cure' stuff which means he's definitely getting some julia roberts action later. nothing says "I'm a keeper" like hangover food, for example once early on in our relationship I got stupidly drunk at a show and the next morning tyrone went out into the cold winter to bring me greasy a&w breakfast food and orange juice which solidified what a gentleman he is in my mind.

so javier bardem is basically doing a bali-type version of that I guess.

now they're talking about durians and javier bardem is all "don't eat those they taste like dirty feet" which apparently is completely accurate. I see them all the time when we go to the asian grocery and I always pick them up and think "today is the day I eat the stinky fruit" but honestly I'm scared.

this is what wikipedia has to say about durian stink:

The edible flesh emits a distinctive odour that is strong and penetrating even when the husk is intact. Some people regard the durian as pleasantly fragrant; others find the aroma overpowering and revolting. The smell evokes reactions from deep appreciation to intense disgust, and has been described variously as almonds, rotten onions, turpentine, raw sewage, and gym socks. The odour has led to the fruit's banishment from certain hotels and public transportation in southeast Asia.

so far that has been the only time I've felt like I 'connect' with the movie, because saying "I want to spend a year travelling in XYZ countries and have it comped by my work" is just stating the obvious. otherwise it's a lot of self-indulgence that is nice to think about and imagine but feels kind of far away, which is maybe why people like the book/movie so much. it's fun to imagine.

except now the movie is over and she and javier bardem sailed off into the sunset which just

ruined it all.

whatever mild enjoyment or entertainment I may have been getting has been ruined by the fact that julia roberts just travelled all across the world and did all of this 'self-discovery' only to have a freak-out fight on a beach and then make up and sail off into the sunset. how clichéd. for real.

it's spoiled my mild enjoyment of the film so much that for a second I considered scrapping this post and denying that I even watched it in the first place.

but then I couldn't tell you how it's mediocre and best and tries too hard to be one of those movies you watch with red wine with your best girlfriends after a breakup to make yourself feel better.

though it's drastically better than 'he's just not that into you', so I guess that's a plus.

the big lebowski is the longest movie ever

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or at least it feels that way.

we are watching it right now because Tyrone has never seen it and I've started watching it about four times but have never been able to finish it due to the fact that all the scenes feel very independent of one another and usually I find that kind of film had to pay attention to.

this morning I woke up with a splitting migraine and didn't go in to work and lay around in the dark with a pillow over my head for a while. Jason was over and he and Tyrone were still asleep and Ford was yelling and I'm glad it's over now. you never appreciate life and not having a migraine until after you've finished having migraine and can sit on the couch and blog and watch movies like normal.

though truth be told I'm not really watching it anymore. maybe I'll just be one of those people who never fully sits down and watches the big lebowski to the fullest of their attention.

I don't know, it's a good film and the characters are ridiculous and over the top, but it's just... too slow? I'm not sure. it all just feels really fragmented and and I don't really care about any of the characters. except john goodman's character, he always steals the show.

honestly I've been just as entertained looking at gifs from the big lebowski as I have been actually watching the big lebowski. them's just the facts.


Yesterday I saw Father's Day at the Cinématheque

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but don't be intimidated by the fact that I saw it in a movie theatre with an accent aigu in the name because it wasn't as fancy as it sounds, though the Cinématheque it pretty much the best place to find indie movies and film festivals playing in Winnipeg.

but I'm not here to talk to you about the great independent movie theatre that I adore in my city, I'm here to talk to you about the amazing grindhouse flick that I saw there which is Fathers Day. I blogged about Astron 6 waywayway back in August 2010 when they were casting for male parts in the movie and then again when I had to turn down an offer to audition because I had so much ish going on which I am thoroughly kicking myself for it now. Fuck!

anyway Father's Day premiered at the Toronto After Dark Film Festival and here is what it won:
audience choice awards: best feature film
best hero
best kills
most original film
best trailer
best poster
and that's just one festival which should be indicative of the credit that the movie deserves. everywhere this movie went it got amazing reviews (some of which you can read here, here, here, here, here and I think you get the point. there's lots more where that comes from).

anyway you didn't come here to read about what other people think, you came here to read what I think and here it is:

the movie is full of people eating other people, vomiting, blood, gore, gross sex, hallucinations, jackets, dicks, lots of topless ladies and one naked dude and I loved every minute of it. the plot goes from being weird and ridiculous about a guy who goes around raping dads to somewhere totally bizarre and way more "wtf" in the 3rd act and manages to keep its shit together. which is saying something. on top of that it's really, really funny. Canadians know humor, what can I say.

what I love most about the movie though, which kind of makes me a suck, is the amount of love that clearly went into making it. you could tell that everyone involved with it was doing it because they supported their friends who were making something really fucking cool and original. it has the same 'labour of love' feel as The Mighty Boosh and Trailer Park Boys except with more penises, boobies and entrails. which is fine by me.

we took John and Kat to see it with us and John loved it as much as we did and Kat made a face and told me "it had funny parts" and then told me that gore makes her nauseous. but she told me that she knew when the gory parts were coming because of the music that would start up so she knew when to close her eyes while the rest of us were trying not to blink and miss anything.

so if you're in Winnipeg and you like grindhouse stuff and you want to support some talented local filmmakers Father's Day is running at the Cinématheque until Saturday March 24th so pick a time to go see it and then tell me what you thought because the more praise I hear about the film the less creepy I feel blogging about how great it is over and over and over.

and if you don't live in Winnipeg and you want to give 'er a watch, Troma should be releasing it on Blu-Ray and DVD on father's day. fuck yeah.

also make sure to go 'like' Astron 6's FaceBook page and troll the collection of articles and fan art they post there so you know I'm not the only one obsessing hard over this movie.

Tinker Tailor Soldier Snore

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is what they should have called Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy which is a movie starring a bunch of really amazing British actors which fools you into thinking the movie will be anything but slow-moving, dull, tedious, and a lot of other synonyms for 'boring', which is what it was.

the picture above this text is a lie, or at least a partial one. the first bit is interesting but then it goes on forever and we just couldn't deal with it anymore.

in case you missed it, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy vs Spy is a film based on what is apparently a great book by John LeCarré which is about british spies and the amazing Gary Oldman stars a spy who comes back to start spying on a bunch of other spies of whom he used to be a part of, but isn't anymore due to a big complicated plot that I don't feel like going into because the plot managed to make a movie which is under two hours feel like four hours, which is why we didn't finish it.

the reason we started watching was 1. because we had just watched TMNT and wanted something "more serious" and 2. because I am addicted to watching Benedict Cumberbatch and now that Sherlock is between seasons I need to get my BC where I can get it which is apparently in Tinkerbell, Tailor, Soldier, Spy which is unfortunate because even his prime acting and sharp suits didn't save it.

but with a cast line-up including Gary Oldman, The Big BC, Colin Firth, Tom Hardy, John Hurt and more, Tinker, Taylor Swift, Soldier, Spy should be great, and the first part is except for the fact that it cuts between past and present tense so quickly that we had to stop the video and double-check that we weren't both confused about what was going on. which we usually were. maybe that's the point but there's only a year between both timelines so it's not even like you can really use style as an indicator, just Gary Oldman's hair colour changing back and forth.

maybe the book is better and certainly the film adaptation of The Spy Who Came in From The Cold was amazing but basically this film felt like a big circle-jerk about uppity slow british dramas and an attempt to see how long that people would sit in their seats and endure the whole thing, which was 2/3 of the way through for us.

and thanks to wikipedia I still get to know how it ended. which was how we both assumed it would end.

save yourself some time and read the plot here.


saw robocop at the cinema last night

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yeah you heard that right, at the cinema as part of the great digital film festival which means seeing old movies on the big screen for (pretty) cheap, which is what we did last night after I worked for four hours getting cute Italian seniors drunk at the v-day party at my work. so obviously I needed some blood, gore and 'splosions to help me relax.

we went with Kat and jbroadway who gave us a lift because it was colder than a witches tit outside last night and not even Robocop is worth braving -40 weather to go see.

and would you believe I've never even seen Robocop before? yeah, I live under a rock.

it also was released the year I was born along with other such classics as
dirty dancing
good morning vietnam
evil dead 2
full metal jacket
empire of the sun
lethal weapon
the princess bride
the running man
harry and the hendersons

just kidding about that last one. plus this isn't a post about awesome movies that were released in 1987 it's a post about how awesome Robocop is and how every movie set in 'the near future' from the 80s just looks more like the 80s than the 80s did?

especially the haircuts

but this isn't a post about haircuts or style in Robocop it's a post about how Robocop manages to be a totally over-the-top satire of corporatism, technology, capitalism, the media and the ideology of progress with ironic billboards and games that involve nuking your enemy before they nuke you and the new car the 6000 SUX.

though my parents had a 6000 when I was a kid and it did suck

but this isn't a post about how much my parents pontiac 6000 sucked, it's a post about how Robocop taught me that you don't leave nuclear waste lying around in back alleys in bad neighbourhoods because some guy could drive his van into it and wind up looking like this:

but this isn't a post about nuclear waste melting skin, it's a post about Robocop and how when we went to see it there were a bunch of super-wasted guys sitting in the row behind us who kept cheering and clapping and yelling and it was super annoying and rude because you know what? even though it's an old movie it doesn't mean you can act like a drunken douchebag and clap and yell at the parts you think are funny because news flash you're not the only one in the theater, dumbass.

but this isn't a post about stupid guys in the theater, it's a post about Robocop and how awesome Red from That 70's Show was as one of the bad guys and how his line "bitches, leave" to the coked-up prostitutes is probably one of the most badass low-key villain lines ever

but this isn't a post about how impressed I was by Kurtwood Smith's wicked performance in Robocop, it's a post about Robocop and how great I thought it was and how I'm glad I got to see it in all it's bad 80s glory on the big screen because you don't get the full effect of the gore and explosions and general badassery when you watch that kind of flick at home, I think.

and to refresh your mind about how terrible/awesome it is, enjoy the original trailer

but apparently the sequels all suck, so let's just forget they made those.

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