Tagged: throwback-thursday

#TBT Sitting on a campus bench: a poem

- by admin

Wrote this while on campus back in April of 2013 which feels like a lifetime ago. It's funny how everything changes except the amount of female UW students wearing Lululemon.

uncomfortable benches
in the lobby of Centennial Hall
people crammed together
on their smart phones
individual worlds.
heavy escalator traffic
going up
going down
am I late for class?
most girls wear their hair up
lululemon head bands
lululemon everything
nice bums.
oh hello
three piece suit guy
where did you come from
where are you going?
I’d follow you but
my legs hurt from my run


#ThrowBackThursday: My Friend Iceland

- by admin

Today I became friends with Iceland.

It sent me a really cute email confirming that we are friends:

An email from Iceland

Halló Alyson --

and takk for being my new best friend.

I look forward to having you as a friend, and maybe sending you emails once in a while telling you about my places and my people, and the things that happening on me.

(Don't worry, I am not the kind of clingy friend who is always sending you messages when you just want some peace and quiet. And if you ever want to stop being friends, I am very uncomplicated about it. You just click a link and poof.)

** A nice picture of me **

Here is a picture of me that my friend Helga made with her hands and a fancy machine. She made it to show you where my places are.

A map of me to show you where my places are
As you can see, she drew some very big red fish on the picture to make it look nicer. Some people may find this scary, but don’t worry: my fish are not really this big.

(Also, you don’t have to worry about the smoke. My volcano has stopped erupting now, so the smoke on the picture is not real.)

** I am all over the place **

I am very old, but I am new to this Inter-net. The people who help me with it thought it would be a good idea for me to use it to make friends and talk to them.






My Blog

Bless bless for now,

It's possibly the cutest marketing campaign ever, since I am now basically enthralled and charmed by Iceland.

Especially this Icelandic Mother-in-Law who taught me to make plokkfiskur, which looks super tasty.

I heart you, Iceland. Let's be besties forever.

* First published on 10/18/10

#ThrowbackThursday: Little Red Corvette

- by admin

4196441450_ed2cc54796This picture is a re-creation of what I look like now, at 11:23am on Friday December 18th, 2009.

There is a small piece of loose skin in my left nostril that is driving me crazy and I have been sitting at my desk rubbing various snot-drenched pieces of tissue around up there trying to dislodge it.

I just spent five minutes blankly staring at the Excel spreadsheet I’m working on and attempting to pick my nose through the tissue, but my nails aren’t long enough to be effective.
It really hurts and is itchy and makes a weird whistling noise when I exhale.
I really want to pick my nose.
Ty said to me the other day
“people’s noses were meant for picking, that’s why our fingers fit up there”
“if people didn’t pick their noses we probably would have evolved out of needing nostrils this size by now”

and we were drunk at the time, but it actually makes some sense.

**Originally posted in 2009

Throwback Thursday: Winnipeg is the best place to be from

- by admin

which is something you don't hear often
not even from people from winnipeg
but it's true.

we're a big city still trying to be a small town
stuck being a small town with big-city problems
with shitty weather half the year
and a seething inferiority complex
in the middle of nowhere
and we spend more time slamming
our sketchy mayor
our shitty transit system
and our winters
than saying good things about anything.

but our little frozen hovel
stuck out in the prairie
like a defiant 'fuck you' to common sense
amazing artists, writers, and most of all musicians
and a complex, intricate love/hate relationship
with the place we call 'home'.

this town makes you nicer
you smile and say 'hello' and make small talk in line at tim horton's
help out your neighbours or that guy
whose car got snowed in up the block
not because you want someone to reward you for doing it
but because it's the nice thing to do, dammit.

being stuck in the middle of the country
makes us much more appreciative
of what other cities have
oh you have efficient mass transit?
oh your skyline has buildings in it?
and up until a few weeks ago
oh you have an IKEA?

its size makes us all connected
everyone's had too much to drink at the king's head
gone to osborne village on canada day
seen a show at the west end
had a greasy burger at blondie's
been harassed the twoonie lady downtown
and we've all suffered from
missing a bus that came thirty seconds too early
or getting stuck outside waiting for a bus that came twenty minutes late
trying to strike a balance between two options
which are never in your favour.

living here makes you hard
we're sarcastic and cynical and critical
of everything
especially ourselves
and especially our hometown
which is why when someone else makes fun of it
they can fuck off
because that's our job
and unless you've spent your life
shovelling snow and dealing with overnight parking bans
hanging out at the toad people-watching on the weekends
driving to grand beach during the summer
complaining about all the things you could do if only
you were somewhere else
you haven't earned the right to bash winnipeg.

because you don't love it like we do
especially not as as much as when we say

"I fucking hate this town".

** thanks to @nicolebarry204 for reminding me that this post existed -it's still true!


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