Je veux ton amour

November 14, 2009 - 2:41am - by admin

I need to be honest with you, I can't hide it anymore.

I can't deny shaking my ass, tapping my toes and my fingers

I can't deny the fierce lip-syncing.

I love Lady Gaga.
She's the best and the worst of the music world and I simultaneously want to hate how cheesy and Top 40's her stuff is while being completely enthralled with how simple it is, how catchy and how it makes me think of Queen and David Bowie.
She's so ridiculously over-the-top, so terrifically haute couture, so fucking vogue that I can't help but be consistently entertained and amazed by her ability to make me watch all of her videos over and over again.

The woman's videos are almost slave-like to a fashion fetish, they're a visual orgasm.

I would pay good money to attend one of her concerts.

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you would be mine

November 12, 2009 - 6:13pm - by admin

last night I had a dream that he and I ate a bunch of ecstasy in the form of pills and also these little cake-things that were like larger versions of Roll-Aids.

we got in a car and went to go have dinner with my family at my Nan’s

and the whole way there I was stressing that I wasn’t going to be able to eat anything
and my family would know how fucked-up I was because if I get fuckered my pupils become massive and I have super-light eyes
and it’s totally obvious.

and I was stressing hard.

we got there and were sitting outside for some reason and I looked at him and watched his pupils swell up and overtake his irises and I thought we are so fucked.

my nan came out and I said hi and she ignored me, walked in the other direction and I thought
fuck yes, here’s our chance
and I said “if you’re going to be a bitch and not talk, we’re leaving”
so we got into the car and drove away talking about how much e-tarded sex we were going to have.

we rounded a bend and there was a lake with a washed-out road winding through it and the hill in the background were lit up with the lights of far-off buildings
everything was a deep purple or blue or green and the lights twinkled like fireflies and for some reason Matt Good’s Suburbia started playing and I was charmed and I said
“look, the lights are beautiful”
and they were
and it was so perfect.

and then he drove off the road and into the green, mossy water and somehow the car sunk into the lake and we were standing in waist-high water
dragonflies buzzing around us
and over Matt Good singing you’ll realize I’m missing he yelled

“PISS!”

and I woke up.

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This regret I got accustomed to

November 10, 2009 - 6:42pm - by admin

For Victoria.

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if I go away again you can have my stereo

November 10, 2009 - 6:18am - by admin

so I says to myself
"I'm going to blog the pictures Alyx and I took on friday"
y'know
that night we got
SUPER FUCKING HOSED
and took pictures?

yeah.
that's not happening.

these are so not internet-appropriate.

damn it.

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This key is to your kingdom, this key is to your heart

November 9, 2009 - 9:07pm - by admin

it’s taking every ounce of me not to gush.
really.

instead I’ll just tell you about
Saturday
in which he made
pasta
from scratch
breaded chicken breasts
stuffed with bleu cheese
in
a Portobello and vermouth sauce
and we drank wine
and talked
and talked
and I was…
charmed.

or my Sunday
which consisted of
a perfect omelette
filled with tomatoes
onion
and leftover bleu cheese
with sour cream on top
followed by coffee down the street
hand-holding
among other things
sandwiches made of leftovers
on English muffins
video games
and movies.

I’ve never had anyone
treat me like he does.

and now
I won’t see him for a few days.
which is fine by me.

I like being alone.
I need my space.

… and I’m so used to losing
good things like this
that part of me is scared to get used to him.

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Riding around with a man on your back

November 6, 2009 - 6:21pm - by admin

I have to say that possibly my favorite part about yesterday could have been a few things

an unexpected run-in
going for a super-long walk
sketchy-but-good instant drinks from Sev
stolen-
(then later lost)
- poppies
holding hands
mind-blowing orgasms
laughing till my sides hurt
or
cuddles

but it was probably
My Lovely Horse

(linked because embedding is disabled by request everywhere)

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Muh-muh-muh-MUH

November 5, 2009 - 5:01am - by admin

An exert from a much longer conversation.

G says: im not worried..ill find someone i can tolerate and who can tolerate me back...some day, whats the rush

Me:
haha that's how I felt
and now
scarf
so i guess it's good
yay

G says:
kk.. .that's his name now... "Scarf"



Sweet.

And now:

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Without her I would be doomed

November 2, 2009 - 5:23am - by admin

Hello friends.
Here's some of my new stuffs.
New (vintage original Scottish) hat courtesy of Alyx.
New headband courtesy of... wherever I bought it in Polo Park.
New jacket courtesy of THE ASSHOLES WHO GAVE AWAY MY JACKET AT THE COAT-CHECK AT SCREAM ON FRIDAY.

NOT. IMPRESSED.

Being that I was leaving with Ty and Morley I was one of the last people to leave the venue and after handing in my coat it turns out they gave mine away.
But it's okay, they offered to give me one of the other four jackets that were still there.
Because giving away someone else's coat is really how problems get solved.

Moving on.

Old Pea Coat was like three years old but still got the job done, it breaks my heart not to have her anymore.
Oh, and shelling money I hadn't budgeted for to pay for it wasn't fun either.
Plus, this coat (though cute) doesn't cover my ass like Old Pea Coat did.
It's gonna be a colder winter, that's for sure.

Waah waah.

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Drive you nuts if you let it

November 1, 2009 - 11:08pm - by admin

Hello friends and neighbors!
Enjoy my glorious return to the Internet.
God, it's nice to have a day to myself sometimes.

Anyway I haven't finished compiling pictures from Friday's party yet, so you can bask in my photes from last weekend's Zombie Walk '09
I attended with these fine peeps.
Unfortunately due to extreme partying and not getting to bed until 8am Sunday morning I wound up sleeping till 6pm
(whoops)
and missed the chance to make fake skin and gross, peeling wounds.
Oh well.I still did an okay job I think.
In particular I like the leaf.
My favorite dish!
This kid made my life, at one point we were taking pictures of him and he realized his other zombies had left and ran away and, guys, it was possibly the funniest thing ever.
Sorry I don't have video.
Okay so Pyramid Head isn't a zombie, but fucking terrifying characters from Resident Evil can also come out and join the fun.
Awesome Kool-Aid Man Zombie.
I took this picture immediately before tripping backwards on a median and slamming my head onto the concrete
I rule!

I try to figure that things always happen for a reason, either to teach us or to change us and without going into too much detail something like that is happening
and on one hand it makes me happy
but on the other it makes my stomach twist
I'm in limbo
waiting
but nothing ever worth having comes easy
right?

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Back when I was younger I was someone youd've liked

October 29, 2009 - 4:50am - by admin

Shaz has been bugging me to blog, but there's just a bunch up in the air right now and Flickr was cocking up royal for the last two hours and I'm tired and need to study and wish I had cuddles.

I still love you, Blog, Blogosphere, Internet.

I just don't have the energy for you right now.

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